Bacon

Will-  "Bacon? YES Bacon!"
Me- "No, that is Bacon bits. You put it on salad."
Will- "What?? Why would anyone want to waste perfectly good bacon and put it on a salad. Oh the horror!"
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Me- (to Luke when I see him with his hand stuck to his head) "What are you doing?"
Luke- "I was trying to see if my goo would stick to my hair."
Me- "Oh, yeah. And what did you find out?"
Luke- "It does."  He runs away...with goo stuck in his hair

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Rachel on baby Nick
"Sometimes the baby is so cute and sometimes he is really annoying. Like when he is crying all the time. Like now..."

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Driving home..
Luke- "Why did you let Daddy beat us home?"
Me- "Guess his truck is faster. But we are way cooler."
Luke- "You can't be cooler than Daddy. You don't even have a beard."
Me- "What does a beard have to do with it?"
Luke- "If  you have a beard you are cool. But that is ok mommy. I still love you."

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Bella- "You want to kill Zombies?"
Me- "What?"
Bella- "You haffa get a knife and kill them in the belly."
Then she walks away....

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Will- "If I ever have to make a last request meal, it is totally going to be a subway sandwich."