choose

"It is our choice that shows what we truly are, far more than our abilities"-

Albus Dumbledore

Then choose today whom you will serve...but as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.- Joshua 24:15

Choice is a gift. One of my favorite things to do is to go to a new restaurant. I love looking at the menu. Drinks or appetizers? Chicken or pork? oh my and would you look at all the desserts.... Choice. I love it. For the record, it is almost always chicken. Although I like choice I seem to be a creature of habit!

I make choices everyday. Some are small. Like what to wear or what to eat. Some are huge. Like whether I should offer a helping hand or give up trying to be the best mother/wife I can be.

I decided quite awhile ago that I believed in the Truth of Jesus Christ. If you believe it or not, it is not for me to say. Or judge. And do not label me with that brush. And you know the brush I am talking about. But because I am a believer, I make certain choices I might not otherwise make. I take my children to church because I want to share my faith. I pray for my husband because he is my most valuable earthly relationship. I try my darnedest to treat people with love and respect...I am working on it. My commitment colors my choices.

Because I made a marriage vow to God and my husband, I stay. I work like crazy on it. I shut my mouth (not as much as I should!) and offer help and support. When the grass looks greener on the other side, I water my own. I work, believe, and pray. I choose. Because I am blessed to be a mom, I cook, clean, wipe noses, tie shoes, kiss cheeks, fill sippy cups, read stories, spray the hose, and so on... I work on building a safe and secure family for us. I try to choice effective words and choose to build fun and memorable days. I choose them.

Because I am a teacher, I love them. I listen to them. I search for the right answer and the right presentation. I take notes. I laugh with them. I encourage them. I choose to do this.

In no way is the right choice always the easy choice. Actually, it is usually the opposite. I was once in a discussion about how we have to be "understanding" because of the bad choices some people make. This is my response. I DO understand how the line can be drawn from A to B. That however, is not a certain. I understand how someone made a couple bad turns and ended up in a really bad place. I get it. More than you will know. But then does it color my expectations of them. Should I believe that is the only choice they could make? That their gift of choice was taken? Or could other choices be made? I seems even worse to explain away someone's potential. To hand them a card of escape.

However, choice is a gift. Strength comes from making one good choice. And then another. Just explaining why will not give you peace of mind. It gives you an excuse. I speak from personal experience. I had a perfectly good reason for yelling. I may have. I could rattle off reason after reason why I am justified in doing this and saying that. But it was the wrong choice. I could have made a different one.

With that comes the beauty of it all and the gift of free will. We all get the choice. Me, myself, and I. And at the end of the day, I am responsible and accountable for the choice I made. In that comes great strength and even greater responsibility.

Dear Dog Owners,

Yesterday I was on my way to my SIL's house to help with VBS stuff. So I loaded up the troops and finally had them to the front door. A task in itself I assure you. So we head outside and head to my mom's car (since Scott broke his truck for now). Bella on my hip and the others marching beside me. I load Bella in and buckle her and go to the other side of the vehicle. When I smell it. An awful, repulsive smell. Sorta like, dog crap just stepped in smell. And lo, and behold! It was. On the bottom of Luke's sandal. And on the side of his sandal. And smashed in between his toes. I back him up to the side walk and gag.

I go into the house to get baby wipes. A little upset. I come out and clean him up. After an inspection, I see that Will is dog junk free but Rachel has stepped in it too. So I clean her off. All of this while Bella waits patiently in the car. I open the car door, and tell my children to please walk AROUND the pile of dog crap I am now staring at. The children do and get in the car. I get in the car. And I smell it. Sorta like, dog crap just stepped in smell. But I cleaned them and watched them walk around it? I pull in my driveway and examine children again.

This time, Bella is the only one not blessed with the gift. And Luke has somehow managed to get dog mess all over his shirt?? I think it was his sister kicking her feet into the air while entering the car and catching his BRAND NEW Buzz Lightyear shirt in the process.

And here is where the frustration sets in. I go to look in the front yard. Where my dog never, ever goes. I count SEVEN piles of dog crap. It seems my child hit at least half of them. This is where I can't explain it away. I understand it you take your dog for a walk and forget to grab a bag. It has been hot so you "forget" to come back and clean it up. But SEVEN times???That is just rude. That is someone who has no consideration for others.

I take all 4 kids into the backyard. I hose off all three of them. Luke was wet and crying. Will didn't get why he needed cleaned "It is only a little bit mom." And Rachel found this as one of the most embarrassing moments of her young life. I strip Luke naked and tell him to go get new clothes. Did I mention that #4 got into the pool during all of this and now was soaked? After I had 4 dog crap free children, I had to clean out the car.

I load all 5 of us in and show up late and flustered.

So this is my plea. If your dog must releave himself, please, please bring a bag. Clean it up. There is no "poop police" that clean up from your dog. And certainly my goodwill will fade after 7 piles. I thank you ahead of time for your help in this matter. Rachel does too.

My little fairy

Summer days are for...

ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!

PARTY!!!

I told him not to. But he went and turned 4 anyway. What did he want for his birthday? "Guns, swords, and games."

We had a great day with lots of family. With the help of a super duper friend, we found some air conditioners (after the speech from my husband to let him buy things when he wants to and we wouldn't be in this mess). We cooled our house to a nice 80 degrees. (gulp) However, soon after the party started the clouds came and it did end up raining. Luke had a blast. Such a thankful child. "Thank-you so much mommy for the cake. You bought me candles? Thank-you, thank-you!"

summertime

aaaahhhhh....

The northeast has been hit with quite the heatwave. And I refuse to complain. I feel terrible actually for my poor husband who normally thinks 70 degrees is ten degrees too hot. My poor baby daughter whose hair is soaked with sweat when she woke up from nap. For all of my poor souls who don't bask in the glory of the heat.

But as for me....aaaahhhhh.....

Give me the sun. Give me the smothering heat. I sit on my swing and take a deep breath. I feel the humidity around me. To be like a comforting blanket. Everything just seems so much better in the summer. Brighter sky. Laughing kids in the yard. Flowers. And did I mention the sunshine??

It is a bit hot. But give me a heat wave over a PA blizzard any day.

Lucas Scott

My brown eyed boy. When the doctor laid you in my arms I though "here he is. And he has his daddy's eyes." Your brother had blue and your sister green. But you....your eyes just pulled me in. And I never left.

Daily you tell me how pretty I am. You bring me a fist full of flowers. A heart so full of love. But you are my super hero. You save the day and jump from places that stop your mamas heart. You capture the bad guy all with a chocaolate milk mustache and a dirty nose. And then give me the thumbs up signal like "what is the problem?" You are stubborn. You stick to your guns. Don't know where you get it.

You bring a spark into my life. You bring an unforgetable smile. You keep me young. You keep me laughing. You keep me on my toes! I love you little man.

Do me a favor? Stay 4 for long while. Or at least promise you will always bring me a fist full of flowers with a "you're the best mom" for a long while.

birthdays

"And in the end it is not the years in your life that count. It is the life in your years."

Abraham Lincoln

Today, in case you are not on facebook, is my 31st birthday! I know some people are not big on birthdays, but I love them. My birthday is a day to celebrate life. What a gift. What a blessing to take another breath. And I am thankful beyond words for the wonderful people that cover my life.

Birthdays are often reflective times for me. This year I thought about all that I have. It can take your breath away when you really think about it. I have so many people who love me. Yesterday we had an awesome family reunion. Filled with laughter and games. People who we are connected to. Family. I have the most wonderful husband who loves like no one else I have ever met. 4 beautiful, intelligent, and amazing kids. A mom I couldn't imagine life without. An extended family who is the best. The best brothers and sisters. A job I adore. A secure house. My list could be endless.

Today I received word that a sweet teacher friend of mine passed away. Too soon from cancer. Although I know she celebrates this day in a better place, it helps me to focus on what a great thing a birthday is!

I had a very nice day. Woke up to a beautiful card from my husband and kids. Flowers, a book, and beef jerkey! I took the 3 big ones to the dentist. My mom had a cake. I got new jammies from my mom and sisters. Shirts from Joe and Lacy. Got my happy birthday song and when I asked William what I should wish for he told me a book! Guess that boy knows me!

And thanks to facebook I had 107+ happy birthdays from family and friends from near and far in both places and years! How awesome it is to be remembered.

And now my happy birthday is endding...as my beautiful baby boy's is starting....

sunshine

Rachel- "Mommy, when school starts will I be in kindergarten?"
Me- "Yes."
Rachel- "Does school start soon."
Me- "Yes." (feeling slightly sick in my stomach)
Rachel- "Hooray!"

Unfortunatly this conversation with my little baby last night has me thinking. Thinking that how can she possibly be old enough to sit in a classroom. Of course I remember these feelings oh too well when my William started. To say it was rough would be an understatment. I still remember sobbing as the bus pulled away WITH HIM IN IT. And here we are with my peanut, my baby girl. To be honest, she is probably more ready than William is. She is much more out going. Not quite as sensative. But that doesn't make it any easier to let her go.

Thinking about how fleeting time is has caused me to stop and think. Instead of cleaning the kitchen for the thousandth time this summer, we went outside. We played in the sun. Built a pretty nice sand castle and made a water slide with the hose. I layed on the swing and took a deep breath.

I am a summer person. I love the feel of the sun on my skin. There is no such thing as "too hot." I love the smell of the outside. I never wear shoes unless I have to leave my house.

Heres to summer. And taking deep breaths and laying in the sun.

Loving the ponytails.
I had William take this. So when the snow is swirling around me I can remember...aaahhh.

Luke laying out with Rachel. But the sun was too bright.

My friend who joined me on the swing.

My soon to be kindergartener