Tuesday, August 2, 2011

model

I have never had any desire to be a model. I know, I know. I sooo have the potential. Except I love to eat. And that whole when lots of people are looking at me I break out in hives and lose my ability to speak...and breath. But because I am a mama, I am a model. Someone is always watching.

We have been introducing Isabella to the potty. Twice today she sat down and peed in the potty. But the thing is, she needs someone sitting on the big potty beside her. Some people like magazines or books, but Bella likes company to sit down with and have a chat. Someone to show her how it is done. Tonight when Scott went to pick up the kids from VBS, Bella came into the kitchen and said "pee mom." I walked into the room and she sat on her potty. She tapped the big potty beside her and said "pee mom." So I sat. She looked at me and smiled. Then she balled her little fists up and began to make weird and loud noises. She gets that from her father of course. She didn't go that time, but she got up and wiped. Smiled and got her diaper.

When I was pregnant with each of my kids, I wondered about what they would look like. Would they have my eyes or Scotts? What color of hair? When people looked at my child would they see me? Would they see him? What never occurred to me is who they would sound like.

Imagine my pride when I am in the next room and I hear my children playing nicely. I hear them calling each other the pet nicknames I call them. When we pray together, I hear them repeat my phrases and thankfulness. I hear them talk tell other people that "Mommy says we should share cause that shows that we care about other people." too sweet.

Imagine my horror when my kids are not being so sweet and sensitive. When I hear them repeat something I shouldn't have said. When I hear the TONE in the voice. Sounds just like her mother. Her model. Her example.

The Bible says in James 1:26 "If you claim to be religious but don't control your tongue, you are just fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless." Worthless. Pretty strong stuff. I sometimes hear celebrities say I never asked to be a role model. Maybe not. But you did ask those same kids to buy your CD. To make a hero out of you. And therefore, you are a role model. I may not have asked for my kids to copy my every move.....but they will. It sobers you to think about what will come out of my kids mouth. What messages am I sending?

I started thinking of this after hearing a Family Like CD on the words of our mouth. I have two books I am reading about the power of the tongue. The power of words. What comes out of my life can carry the power of life or death the Bible says. I can choose to speak mercy or I can condemn. I can choose to look for the goodness or I can join in the complaining and the whining. I can choose what is coming out of this mouth.

Sometimes parenting can overwhelm me. When I look at the vast responsibility I carry daily I feel so small. I feel so unprepared. How can I, a sinful, selfish human ever set a decent example for my children. These beautiful people given to me to raise up? It is then that I have to go to Jesus. For help. For guidance. Sometimes for back-up! I curl up at His feet and ask my example for some help. For some patience. For some good, life giving words to speak. That way when I am in the next room listening to my kids, I will be smiling.

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