Wednesday, November 16, 2011

run, run fast as you can

“It takes all the running you can do, to keep in the same place. If you want to get somewhere else, you must run at least twice as fast as that!”


-The Red Queen


I had my ears pierced  when I was 13. I remember that I was always worried I wouldn't turn them enough. So I began to twist them all the time. It is a nervous habit that stuck. Now I tend to tug at my ears when I am nervous. Which this time of year....is a lot.
I,of course, love the idea behind Christmas. God giving his son so that we could be found worthy. Truly amazing. Oh holy night is one of my favorite songs and nothing is as beautiful as a manger scene.
What I am not a fan of? Lots of presents. And insane "to do" lists. I wish it could come without bangles, bobbles, or trinkets. Guess I do sound a little grinchy.
But truly, each year I set out to make it simpler. And each year I feel like I am getting run over. Repeatedly.
I think I need a good Christmas devotional. Anyone know of any? Or some ideas on keeping it simple? Any tips on online shopping cause that would be awesome too!

Monday, November 14, 2011

Lazy, busy, or electronically illiterate

I am not a fan of daylight savings time. Falling back...leaping forward....whatever. One problem is that some of my clocks automatically reset themselves. Some do not. So I spend the morning running around like a nut case trying to figure out the right flippin' time. Am I late? Early? Did I change that one? Did my husband? Can someone just tell me the real time.

And then it leads to this problem for a week....or so. Cause I don't change clocks. Kind of like I would let garbage fall on my floor cause that is not my job. Changing clocks is hubby's job. And certainly he never cares what time it is. He knows two times- time for work and time for the Steelers game.

This of course has to go with my little tech problem as well. You should have seen me pushing buttons and flipping out on my tech-no van. I seriously turned on my wipers, fog lights, and blared the juke box (who needs this in a VAN??) and still couldn't change the time. Although I figured out how to turn on the butt warmer in the van. Yes, I just said butt warmer.

I sit here staring at my clock on the wall. It is wrong. I know this cause my laptop DOES correct its self. I think about how I wish the wall clock was right and I would be that much closer to bedtime. I am annoyed that my clock is still off.  But do I just up and change it? Nope. Cause I don't do trash or clocks. Or change oil, tires, or build a fire.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

miracles and thankfulness

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” — Albert Einstein



Last night my hip was asleep. Because a head was on it. When I lay with the three older ones to go to sleep, they have to take turns on who sleeps by mommy. And the one whose turn it isn't sleeps at my feet or with their head on my hip. We are a tangled mess of elbows, arms, heads, and blankets. I can't turn. Can't breathe barely. I think to myself, I have to get Scott to take a picture of this sometime. Years from now, we will look at it and laugh. We will remember how they would fight about whose turn it was. About whose turn it was to hug the top half or the bottom half. Years from now, I know I will tear up and remember. For today, I am thankful for a numb hip.

This is my 5th pregnancy. It isn't that I have not felt blessed each and everytime. It isn't that I have not realized that a baby is a miracle. But this time, when I looked down on the two lines, my eyes welled up with tears. Because I in no way deserve all of the goodness I have, I see, that I have touched.

I could go on forever. My husband who had flowers and Frooties (my fav candy!) when I came home from a work trip. My kids who always have me laughing. My family, my home, my job....my life.

But most of all...for grace. Receiving God's favor even when I don't deserve it. Going to the cross to save me from a life I would choose and deserve. But He stood in the way. Laid down his life....for me.

It is overwhelming.

This little one I carry has reminded me of this. Of gifts and blessings given freely. Reminding myself to say thank-you, be thankful. To not taken a moment for granted.